I am a 28 year old female who has identified as a straight female most of my life, a lil while back i finally came to realize after dealing with depression that i am in fact ftm (female to male transsexual) , i was very femme before, so just want to know if there is anyone out there like me, who identified as femme before realizing they were ftm?
As long as the queer community speaks on behalf of transsexual against their will, questions like yours will always emerge. The next paragraph may seem off-topic to your question, but it is necessary to reinforce why self-identity based sexual identification is a fatal flaw. This is necessary to answer your question.
Labeling someones sexual nature purely by how they identify is a fatal flaw. A man may sexually self-identify as "god's gift to women" but that doesn't mean he is. Than there is the problem with validating economically coerced or even physically forced sexual identities. Lesbians who get thrown out of their house and are forced to have sex with men to survive start identifying a bi and than eventually heterosexual until they are out of their situation and than start self-identifying as lesbians again. Many of Thailand's so called self-identified ladyboys are really victims of economic coercion as well. When an effeminately cute boy grows up, he can either make 17 cents an hour at a Nike plant or $100 a night prostituting himself as a ladyboy? I won't go into any detail about the outright FORCED transgender outward presentation of Arab boys other than to say, "Google search Bacha Bazi"!
No back to your question. If the reason you self-identified as a heterosexual fem woman was the most common that people do, than of course you initially self-identified as a heterosexual fem female. It was what was expected of you. You probably would have faced tremendous abuse otherwise. Identifying as a butch or even tomboy let alone a man, would have been a futile battle that would have led to severe trauma. To summarize and hopefully without sounding patronizing, "you did what you HAD to do"! You probably got so used to it that it was all you felt confident you could do and you carried into adulthood long enough to be away from the influence of family so you can transition in relative peace and comfort.
It would not let me comment on other so I will comment on here, some of my wording was obviously incorrect. I meant more femme presenting rather than femme identifying. And the depression I realized came from feeling dysphoric in my body, so the gender issues are the root of my depression.
I have always felt insecure with myself and my body, so I tried to be as "girly" and "pretty as I could to counteract those feelings. But it never helped and in fact made it worse. I see a boy in drag in the mirror not a girl,,...I thank everyone for their responses.
Femme presentation or femme-feeling inside?
If this is totally adult onset transsexualism, nothing before now, appearing just after depression, that will raise some red flags with therapists. It won't prevent transition, but it will mean that more caution is warranted.
I used to play sports all the time. Would dress non-girly, wouldn't gossip, and thought girls were scary and adorable at the same time.
Time passed, I didn't think of myself as a girl anymore. I don't know that I label myself FTM or anything though
Depends how do u identify ur sexuality?
If your a gay male or a bi male(like myself) then yeah my buddy adrian was like that and he's ftm
i wasnt extremely femmy but im sum what a pretty boy now
why do you have to identify as anything? just be you.
grew up as a tomboy...realized im a boy....nuff' said
